Wasted Days and Wasted Nights

Warning:  Adult Content

sprout couch















Wake up, to break up…

Me:  Oh Lord. Morning wood.

Brad:  That’s not much wood.

Me:  It’s enough. Oh my God, it’s getting bigger just talking about it.

Brad:  Of course it is. It isn’t deaf.

Me:  Well put some ear muffs on it.

Brad:  I’ll put some muff on it.

Me:  Here we go.

Sweet talker…

Brad:  Just look how it’s resting on it’s own bed of balls. Your nose could do that.

Me:   My nose isn’t tired.

Brad:  Look how happy and youthful it looks resting there.

Me:  If by ‘youthful’ you mean ‘old and wrinkled.’

Brad:  [whispering] Careful. It’s listening.

Walden, WY…

Oh look! That’s an old cowpoke.

You’ve got something I’d like to poke.

Slow down, I wanna take a picture.

I got something you can take a picture of.


Yellowstone National Park

Man, fly fishing is huge out here.

I got a fly you can fish something huge out of.

Will you ever grow up?

I got something growing up right now.

Here’s a tip, ‘shut the fuck up.’

I got a tip for you.

OMG. I was really behind the ball on that one.

I got some balls you can get behind.

This never gets old.














Weekend Getaway cont.

While we were “on-the-lam,” we stayed right on the Mighty Mississippi at the Thomson Causeway Campgrounds. Great place to be, fyi.

Sun in hand                                                           Gorgeous sunset over Iowa.

Thomson sunsetXX                                                                Basking in the glow…

Golden RV sunsetXX                                                       Wishing upon a shooting star…

shooting starXXNext day, Brad had to do some muffler diving. It isn’t all glamorous. He got the job done. The clanking was over, so we could enter a campground without waking the dead.

mufflerXXWhile Brad was lying down on the job, I noticed this important warning label. Thankfully, now I will never put my fingers into grills. Of any kind.


Seriously, I would NEVER even consider fingering this…zebra grylls






Like I even needed the warning.bloody face






Little Weekend Getaway

Prison ViewXXHere I am parked by the Thomson Federal Prison in Thomson, IL.         Pretty cool.                     From the outside.

pick up hikersXX      Got a big kick out of some vandal’s work here. Will do!

Prison breakXXNo time to dawdle, I see Brad is ready to be picked up for our conjugal weekend, camping at the Thomson Causeway on the Mighty Mississippi.

I love him for making the time for our little weekend getaway. All those years running up and down the sidelines shooting the high school football games really paid off. Of course, I told him he should have used a camera instead of an AK47.  He never listens to me.

Brad prison signXXBrad catching a breather before we head to the Mississippi. Always the tourist.

nophotosXXYou’re not the boss of me.



Breaking Brad

BB sign on RV 01XXSo here’s the deal. Brad and I have been dreaming about getting an RV for years. We’ve had a subscription to Motor Home magazine for about 13 years. We have been to several RV shows over the years. We even went to RV dealers and talked about the Navion View because we knew that was the size and brand we wanted. But as much as I pushed, pleaded, cajoled and tantrumed, Brad was always in the “It’s not time yet” mentality.

“Wait ’til the kids are out of school.”

“We can’t afford it.”

“The stars have not aligned.”

“You need to be naked more.”

I explained to him that whenever he takes the plunge, I will never hear the words, “I wish we had waited longer.”

He held out. One day after getting some bad news about a peer’s health, he started caving. He started to fear not being able to do it at all. Then the perfect 2006 View became available in Central Illinois for the right price and the right mileage. An elderly couple was ready to sell and we swooped in to grab it.

We picked it up on a frigid, windy day in January of 2011. I only tried to kill us once while swerving to an exit. The hardest part was seeing it sitting in our driveway for months until we could de-winterize it and take it out.

The whole point of this blurb is to explain the coolest sign ever made by my nephew Ben in California. My brother Nick helped engineer the hinges to make it foldable because we didn’t want it to take up too much room in our little RV.     It. Is. Perfect.  People that know the show have stopped to take pictures of it. It is a great conversation starter. And it will always serve as a reminder to Brad that I was right, am always right, and will forever be right. Case closed, bitch!

BB signXX